Your friends at Esquire have a Friday lesson for you. Don't start a fight you can't finish.
On this fine day, the tip might be helpful to filmmaker Joe Dante—best known as The Gremlins director—who just fired senseless, random shots at The Mandalorian's Grogu, AKA Baby Yoda. Check it out. “I think the longevity of [Gremlins] is really key to this one character [Gizmo], who is essentially like a baby,” Dante told The San Francisco Chronicle. “Which brings me, of course, to the subject of Baby Yoda, who is completely stolen and is just out-and-out copied. Shamelessly, I would think.” Woah! Sounds like Dante has been sitting on that one for three years. Now is probably a good time to disclose that Dante works as a consultant on the upcoming Gremlins reboot, Gremlins: Secrets of the Mogwai, which will hit HBO Max this fall.
If you're unfamiliar with the creatures in question, Baby Yoda is a Force-using orphan in the Star Wars universe, best known for barfing green goo in expensive spaceships and telling Luke Skywalker to f*ck off so he could hang out with his space dad. Gizmo? The little dude, who yes, also has huge ears and easily fits in a backpack, just kinda loves TV and can be crafty sometimes. (Never forget when Gizmo lit a pencil on fire and shot it at the Spider-Gremlin thing.) Both are mischievous. Both are cute. But they're not even remotely on the the same level.
Why? Because in a fight between Baby Yoda and Gizmo—which should absolutely be made, Alien vs. Predator-style—the green kiddo would clean up. Baby Yoda has a strict diet of bone broth and the occasional space cookie, while Gizmo eats fried chicken. The Mogwai's biggest influence is Rambo, who is formidable, sure, but Baby Yoda takes cues from the deadliest bounty hunter in the galaxy. Face it. You might not want to think about it, but Baby Yoda would bring back out the deadly Force choke, just because Gizmo was kinda getting on his nerves, because Gremlins are inherently annoying. I don't make the rules. This is just how it is.
